Perceptions Over the Phone

Photo by Chivalry Creative on Unsplash

After I have a conversation,
I often feel a disturbing sensation,
Like what I’ve said was misunderstood,
Perceived to be rude or not very good,
Like whatever I said may have hurt their feelings,
Or didn’t come across as socially appealing
Like whatever I said wasn’t what I quite intended,
And I need to call back to have explained and mended.

Did I talk over them, or too quickly change topic?
My analysis may be too microscopic.
Did I talk out of turn, or try too hard to be funny?
I try to avoid talks on politics and money.
Did I talk too much not letting them be heard?
Did I bring up a memory they didn’t want stirred?

I know my intentions are never to be impolite,
But sometimes I feel like it just didn’t go right.
Sometimes I feel like it had all gone south,
And I ended up putting my foot in my mouth.
Or I rambled on and went a little too far,
And I ended up sounding a little bizarre.

I have tried to come to the realization
That this is an unfounded sensation.
That my perception may not really be true.
But this, of course, is a hard thing to do.
Because in the moment, once you have said it,
A conversation is so hard to edit.
And after the moment has come and gone,
Sensations of insecurity often just linger on.

I know my over analysis may seem absurd,
But I never take for granted the power of words.